I used to be grossed out by sharing straws.

This morning Tim and I were woken by giggling and squeals from the boys who snuck in bed with us. Tanner's diaper leaked, and he laid right on top of me. I was careful the "number one" only got on me, not the bed. I laid there with Mr. wet pants for about 10 minutes of talking, the four of us, in a situation I would've hurled over 10 years ago.

My siblings used to tease me about never sharing a straw with them. They would strategically ask for a sip, and knowing I hated to share the straw, I'd let them have a sip, then claim I was "no longer thirsty".

My, my. How things have changed. Nice 30 minute scripture reading in the easy chair with the window cracked are now replaced with "get reading in while they bathe". Then Hunter's out, and on my lap, telling me to read aloud while interrupting with vitally important scripture finds such as: "MOMMY!!! I see a number 5! I'm going to be 5!!" and "I see H for Hunter!"

Just the night before I was up late talking to my Tim about how worried I was. One of the boys was going through a stage, and I was worried how to harness it. That night was one of those nights where our 20 minute interaction (he sometimes gets home at 9:30PM) changed me forever. He listened for a while then said "It's all going to work out fine. He'll get over it. But just enjoy it, Suzanne. Enjoy it. There will be a time when you'll wish you had this problems like this to work out when they're gone."

I remembered those nights where I'd fall asleep thinking about me. In a queen-sized feather bed, all by myself. Buying clothes that weren't on sale. Having a place for everything and everything in it's place.

And now, everything in it's place is relative. Sometimes "everything" is shoved in a laundry basket and hidden in the garage just before the door bell rings. Yet, I feel accomplished because the floors are pine-sol'd, only to have the kids lick the pavement. I still use anti-bacterial soap only to have them eat their boogers. I find myself jotting things down with crayon more than ink. All of that pertinent information on "Mazlows High Archery of needs" from school is now replaced with "if I change his diaper now, he might not be finished, and I might have to do it again in 5 minutes."

I laughed at myself when I thought of those things. I thought of all those things yesterday while the boys swam at the pool. I was feeling accomplished that day because my hair was blow-dried that morning. Only to be splashed by chlorinated water.

That night I whispered to Hunter "Hey Weedsie, ya know, when you get big you can do lots of things you can't when you're little. You can be lots of different things. I want you to know that being Hunter and Tanner's mommy is my most favorite!" And now, I not only share straws with my boys, but also drink juice with floaties in it.